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An Excerpt From: DIRTY PICTURES
© Copyright ELISA
ADAMS, 2004.
All Rights Reserved, Ellora's Cave, Inc.
If she had known what an
uproar posing nude for a nationally known men’s magazine would cause, Lily
would have chosen a magazine with a smaller circulation. She leaned against
her partly-open front door, her hands gripping the doorknob so she didn’t
fall over and bash her face off the cement steps, her body swaying forward
and back as the door moved on its hinges. She stifled a yawn, fighting to
keep her eyes open while her brother Jake ranted and raved and waved the
latest issue of Seduced magazine in her face.
“What the hell were you thinking?”
He smacked the magazine on the doorframe hard enough to crease the pages.
His eyes bugged out, his face reddened with rage, and she might have found
it comical had he not dragged her out of bed at six in the morning. “Do you
realize what a mess you’ve gotten yourself into this time? And what are you
doing answering the door in something so…so… revealing anyway? I
could have been anybody, and you might have found yourself in trouble.”
She glanced down at her
ratty, washed-a-hundred-times, extra-large Metallica
concert T-shirt and stifled a chuckle. “Oh, yeah. I dress like this
just to seduce all the men in the neighborhood. Good thing I have you to
watch out for me, Jake, since I apparently have no mind of my own and
wouldn’t be able to defend myself in any situation.” Her annoyance at the
interruption in her much-needed sleep left a tinny taste in her mouth. Or
maybe that was just morning breath. Either way, she needed to go brush her
teeth.
She leaned back a little too
far and nearly lost her balance. The cool metal surface of the front door
hit her in the chin as she yanked on the knob to keep herself from falling.
She rubbed the spot with the heel of her hand.
Caffeine.
She needed caffeine, and
lots of it, if Jake expected her to concentrate on his sermon. He might as
well have been barking like a dog. It all sounded the same before her
morning dose of java.
“Stop with the smart mouth.
This is serious,” he said, or rather, ordered.
She rolled her eyes. Serious
for whom? Was the world going to come to an end because he’d seen his
sister nude in a magazine? For crying out loud.
She snagged the magazine
from his fingers and flipped it closed. How did he manage to get a hold of
it, anyway? Jake the Saint, with a copy of Seduced magazine? It
didn’t fit. Her eyes widened when she saw the white subscription label in
his name on the glossy front cover—along with the post office box he used
for his business mail. She smiled—or the closest thing she could manage
this early in the morning. It probably looked more like a smirk, but hey,
that worked, too. “Shame on you, Jake. Does your wife know about this?”
He opened his mouth, gaping
at her like some demented beached fish struggling for breath. After a few
seconds of uncharacteristic speechlessness, he snatched the magazine back,
rolled it up, and shoved it into his back pocket. A burst of laughter
escaped her.
“Didn’t think so. Are you
through yet? You’re going to wake the neighbors.” He’d been droning on and
on at her since she opened the door five minutes ago. Knowing Jake, he’d be
able to go on for another sixty or seventy if she let him. Maybe being only
semi-coherent wasn’t such a bad thing, after all. She stifled another yawn
as she squinted into the bright sun, scanning the street for any of her
nosy neighbors. None yet. That was always a good sign. “I’d invite you in
for coffee, but since I’d be too tempted to pour the entire pot over your
head, that might not be such a wise idea. If you don’t have anything
worthwhile to say, can you please leave so I can get ready for work?”
Birds chirped in the silence
that followed. Heat bugs buzzed already, signaling another scorcher of a
day.
“No, I’m not through. I
still have a lot more to say, and you’re going to shut your mouth and
listen.”
Too bad he recovered his
voice. She’d been about to forgive him for his little outburst. She shook
her head in disappointment. “I think not, Oh Great Asshole. You can talk
all you want, but I’m finished listening.”
He started to speak again,
but she didn’t hear a word he said. She was too busy slamming the door in
his face.
Brothers.
Men.
She made it to the kitchen
when she heard the door open again. Shit. Having Jake as her
landlord definitely had its drawbacks. What did a girl have to do around
here to get some privacy? Change the locks?
He appeared in the kitchen
door, looking ready to kill. She rolled her eyes.
“Lily Jane, stop right
there,” he told her when she tried to brush past him out of the room.
Of all the nerve. She turned
to glare at him, her hands on her hips. “What now?”
He blinked, apparently taken
aback for a second that she gave him the floor. Did he really expect her to
fight? The more she argued, the longer it would take to get rid of the guy.
After a few seconds of excruciating silence, he cleared his throat. “This
was really irresponsible of you.”
Irresponsible? Ha! He just
didn’t like the fact that his baby sister had grown into a woman. If he’d
had his way, she would have stayed twelve for the rest of her life. “Making
money isn’t irresponsible, Jakey. How do you
think I paid the rent last month?”
He sputtered and coughed,
finally throwing his hands up in the air and shaking his head. “Fine. You
want to be difficult about this, go ahead. Just don’t expect me to be there
for you the next time you need me.”
She raised an eyebrow. “And
when exactly have I needed you?”
“Well…” His eyes rolled
ceiling-ward. After a minute, he looked back at her and frowned. “What are
you staring at?”
“I’m trying to see if smoke
is coming out of your ears. Don’t think too hard. You might hurt yourself.”
She patted his cheek. “Go home, Jake. I don’t want to be late for work
because of some stupid, misplaced tirade. I’m a grown woman. There’s
nothing wrong with showing a little skin.”
Anger flared in his eyes.
She bit the inside of her lip. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Why did she have to
go and say something to set him off, just when he’d started to calm down?
She really needed to learn to control her impulses. Reprimand built in
Jake’s eyes again as he crossed his arms over his chest. Think fast,
Lil. Deal with this before he explodes. She wrinkled her nose. What a
mess that would be. “Look, Jake. You’re right, okay? I shouldn’t have posed
for those pictures. I’ll never do it again. Does that make you feel
better?”
“It would, but I don’t
believe you.” He narrowed his eyes at her. “You don’t really think that.”
Duh. “Of course I do.” Now
get the hell out of my house so I can get out of my nightgown and take a
shower. “You get going to work now before you’re late. I’ll talk to you
soon.”
Yeah, like when the Hell
figure skating team won a gold medal.
“Fine. I’ll go. But we’re
not done talking about this yet.” He stomped back to the front door and let
himself out, closing it hard enough to shake the mirror that hung on the
wall next to it.
“Real mature, Jake,” she
muttered. He could talk until he turned blue, but she didn’t have to
listen. She walked down the hall to the living room and stood by the front
window to watch him drive away down the street. Were all men such
domineering jerks, or only the ones in her life? There had to be some good
ones out there. At least one or two.
Yeah, right. A woman was
much better off with a trashy novel and a showerhead with a massage
setting. Luckily, she had both.
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